兒童或成人 Children or Adults

Children or Adults

There is a growing tendency that children mature at a younger age these days. Our society should accept the reality and adjust the law accordingly.

Today, the movies and Internet around children have too many things about violence and sex. As a result, though we have tried all means to let children know only what they should know,children have known as much as adults. According to statistics,the underage crime rate is rising at a surprising speed. In addition, because laws in some places prohibit underage girls to have abortion without permissions from parents, the increasing number of unmarried mothers is also a worrying phenomenon.

Some surveys show that most 14 to 15 year old children think they are already grown ups, and are eager to behave in their own ways. But the adults' society doesn't think so. Consequently, misunderstandings and quarrels between children and their parents and teachers have never stopped.

Since we cannot change children, we can change our law.We should allow children over 15 to make decisions about their lives without the interference of their parents or teachers, and let them assume the responsibility for their own behaviors. Maybe in this way, the world would be more peaceful.

簡評

Small is beautiful.郭倩同學的這篇作文,短小精悍,在方寸之間論述井井有條。雖然沒有一鳴驚人之語,但語言簡潔流暢,結構清晰,觀點鮮明,是這篇作文的突出優點。

作者開門見山,在首段擺明自己的觀點,然後運用多種寫作手法進行論證,尤其是fact and figures。通過統計調查結果來說話,比單純的抽象分析具有更強的說服力,這是本文的顯著特色。

作者的語言功底也相當出色,尤其善於在論述文中使用各種銜接方式,如as a result,though,in addition,because,consequently等等。這些銜接詞的使用使文章結構顯得十分清晰,說理絲絲入扣,邏輯嚴密,無懈可擊,這是值得廣大學生學習的。